According to some estimates, roughly one in ten Americans work in the restaurant industry. That’s a lot. That’s big. And now you’re probably either thinking of your current restaurant job, the last one you had, or of your friend or family member who’s always talking about theirs.
Because it’s big business – but it’s also a bit sordid and complicated.
Just take these deceptively banal confessions from restaurant hosts.
10. You got served
Come on man, you know how time works.
9. Eye candy
This isn’t matchmaking – it’s ensuring the highest rate of tips.
8. Got you covered
Oh, is there? I didn’t notice, because managing these tables isn’t my freakin’ job or anything.
7. The blame game
Sorry, those monsters are yours and yours alone.
6. Time crimes
The answer is pretty much never gonna be known.
5. Lie around
Sounds like the approach a lot of people take with their small children.
4. I have reservations
Why do you think the host is here, exactly?
3. Ignorance is bliss
I assume you’re not here for food, then?
2. The long and short
Oh goodness forgive me, I didn’t notice how important you were.
1. Spit happens
If you only go so far as fantasizing you’re very strong indeed.
Next time you find yourself out and about – be kind to the hosts. They’re doing a job, and the restaurant doesn’t revolve around you.
Do you have workplace confessions you want to get off your chest?
Leave them in the comments.