You know, our bodies are pretty amazing machines. They have the ability to heal themselves, and help us do all sorts of cool things that we never thought possible.

Doctors know this better than pretty much anybody. They see what’s going on with people and their bodies ALL THE TIME and they’ve got some good news: it’s gonna be okay. Well, unless you’re a moron. Then you’re probably f*cked.

Recently, 15 of them went on reddit to answer the question: “Doctors of Reddit, what is something that you wish everyone knew about their body?”

1. Blood in. Blood out.

Ejaculating blood happens to most people at least once in their lives and in 99% of cases it resolves without taking any action within a week. It doesn’t even warrant a doctor visit.

Peeing blood (for both sexes) is a serious medical emergency and you should immediately go to the ER.

People think it’s the other way around.

2. Be honest!

That there is a wide range of ‘normal’.

Don’t be embarrassed by your body. Having said that, if you are concerned about anything, ask your doctor. We have generally heard it all before, and trust me, we have (nearly always) seen it all before. Maybe you have something that has been bothering you for ages, but you were too scared or embarrassed to ask about it … Just ask! It might be ‘nothing’ and you have been stressing about it for no reason. And if not, then you are at least one step closer to getting it fixed. No one can help if they don’t know. There are no stupid questions, so ask away.

I’m always amazed when I have been asked about something that has been bothering a patient for years and years, but they were too embarrassed / scared to bring it up. Most of the time, it is nothing / a completely normal body function / feature. Other times, it is something that should have been discussed right away.

YOU know your body best. So speak up! Don’t wait for the doctor to “ask the right question”.

3. It’s all about moderation

Some people seem to think that if you act healthy for a bit, it’ll make up for being a wreck.

There are so many things wrong with this. Just one example – antioxidants are like gas for your car. You can store up a certain amount of vitamins, but your tank can only hold so much. If you binge and overfill your tank, it doesn’t do anything (you excrete it out as waste), and you can’t expect to go the next several months without gas just because you tried to overload it before. You’re going to still need to get gas. Same goes for your fruits and veggies.

Had someone tell me he went vegetarian for a few weeks, which meant he was done for the year. He was dead serious.

Had a patient at risk for heart failure try to insist that if she stayed away from salt entirely for x days/weeks, she should be able to have her fill of McDonald’s fries and ramen.

Had a smoker argue that if he stopped for some time, he should be able to smoke freely for a while. With some digging, “stopping” turned out to mean a couple less cigarettes a day.

4. DO YOU WASH YOUR EYEBALLS?

Women, please do not use soap or douching products inside your vagina.

It has a delicate pH balance and this is how you get yeast infections. Wash your labia, but do not clean internally.

The vagina is self-cleaning just like your eyeballs.

Do you wash your eyeballs? No. Do you wash your face? Yes.

5. Yes!

How to check for skin cancer. If you see any moles or anything that are:

A – asymmetrical B – border (odd borders, like they’re jagged or something) C – Colour (different colours) D – Diameter (grows) E – Evolve (Well, evolves)

Go get it checked out. It might be skin cancer.

6. Woah

-Where the orifice each gender urinates through really is.

-Antibiotics are not some magic cure for every pain in your body, nor for the flu or common cold.

-Never ever boil breast milk (in my country there is a popular belief that breast milk jaundice in newborns can be treated by boiling one’s breast milk – but by doing this you destroy all the nutrients and it basically becomes as nutritious as water is).

-Do not give honey to children below the age of 1.

-Do not rub your child with rubbing alcohol to lower his fever.

-Baby wipes don’t substitute daily baths/showers.

Yes, I am a pediatrician.

7. Be nice to your body

You only get one body.

The way you treat it has a significantly higher impact in how your health will end up in a decade than what sort of interventions we can give you.

You really should treat your body like a temple.

8. Track your meds!

This is going to sound really basic, but i wish my patients would know what meds they are on when they come to the hospital.

At least once a day comes somebody in who goes ” yeah i take 8 pills in the morning, 3 in the evening, and 4 at lunch but dont ask me which, youre a doctor, you should know”.

I beg of you, before going to a doctor that has never seen you before, write your meds, dosage and all on a piece of paper.

9. AHHHHHH

I’m a dentist and if you don’t take care of your gums your teeth will fall out of your head.

Then you’ll get pissed at me when your jaw bone atrophies and your denture doesn’t fit anymore.

10. Yikes

You often will feel normal even with high blood pressure. It’s often found incidentally.

So don’t wait until it gives you symptoms you don’t want to go through.

11. Tell the truth!

Tell us what drugs and alcohol you’re on.

We aren’t gonna tell the cops. We aren’t gonna lecture you.

But it might change the anesthesia I give you. Some stuff I give you might kill you. If you drink a 30 pack a day, tell me.

12. Absolutely,

Your mental health is just as important as your physical health.

13. So skinny tea doesn’t make you live forever?

Baby doctor here, about to graduate: unless you have liver or kidney failure, your body detoxes itself really well.

Don’t get scammed by these detox teas and whatever!

14. Damn

Not only that, but you typically have years of slowly declining quality of life rather than just dropping dead instantly.

So many people say “I’d rather just live the lifestyle I want, eat/smoke/drink/abuse substances as I please, and die happy.” Except you won’t. You’ll spend your 50s and 60s on dialysis and waiting for a kidney or liver transplant, going to the doctor every other week and taking a dozen different medications. Don’t even think about going on vacation or watching your grandchildren graduate from high school. The last 10 years of your life are going to be horrible.

Before you ruin your life with smoking or alcohol a bad diet, ask yourself how you feel about dying in a nursing home at 67.

15. WEAR A HELMET!

Motorcycles are f*cking awesome but they are also death machines.

Don’t ever get on a f*cking motorcycle, but if you do anyway, WEAR A f*ckING HELMET.

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