Everybody has their favorite sex-related story. They’re usually not about the times we just had really good sex; that’s more of a personal thing you kind of treasure for yourself.
No, the stories we share are when things went bad, or weird, or hilarious. That’s the good stuff. And lucky for us, now there’s a giant collection of these stories on Reddit.
It all started with this prompt:
And the answers came pouring in. Here are just a few of the best ones. (I’m sure you realize this, but you’re about to venture into NSFW territory.)
1. The Double Wind
We both F*rted at the exact same time, whilst maintaining eye contact.
– Amber-Dragon
2. It’s Nerf or Nothing
We’ve been in an ongoing Nerf war since I want to say February.
Recently she pulled a pistol from underneath her pillow and shot me point-blank while I came.
– p*ops_McClanahan
3. The Craigslist Paul Rudd
I met a guy off of craigslist once. I only share this story with my closest friends, so here goes nothing.
I was trying to get over someone I loved who had just moved away, so I decided to do this on a whim.
The guy from Craigslist literally looked like the spitting image of Paul Rudd. No joke. So I was like “fuck yes let’s do this”.
We started making out and our clothes started coming off. Things start getting hot and heavy.
I grab his hair to pull on it a little, and
It f*cking comes off.
His hair was in my hands.
I realized within about five seconds of silence that I had just pulled a toupee off of his head.
– aglassofmerlot
4. Not Getting Your Deposit Back
once was at an Airbnb and the bed was making a lot of noises and mid f*ck the headboard broke off and fell on top of us
– heymynameisjack
5. “Meetings”
Gf and I are both working from home, which has led to mid-day quickies – our “meetings.” It’s awesome. Little bit of role play. I’m a lucky guy.
Anyway, last week we’re right in the middle and my phone rings. I’m certain it’s my boss.
So I stop and run out to the living room to get my phone, but I’m still wearing socks and I slip rounding a corner and just completely hit the floor.
No grace at all.
So I answer the phone and I’m laughing at myself and out of breath from the sex, and my boss is confused as to why I’m so amused at the news of other people getting furloughed. So he probably thinks I’m an as$hole. – Gf and I are both working from home, which has led to mid-day quickies – our “meetings.”
It’s awesome. Little bit of role play. I’m a lucky guy.
Anyway, last week we’re right in the middle and my phone rings. I’m certain it’s my boss. So I stop and run out to the living room to get my phone, but I’m still wearing socks and I slip rounding a corner and just completely hit the floor. No grace at all.
So I answer the phone and I’m laughing at myself and out of breath from the sex, and my boss is confused as to why I’m so amused at the news of other people getting furloughed. So he probably thinks I’m an as$hole.
– TheBrownCouchOfJoy
6. Call Me Kyle
Ex boyfriend had a daddy kink. During s^x he asked me who he was. I’m the dumbest person on earth so I responded with “my boyfriend?”
He said no and asked again. “Kyle?” He said not quite. It then clicked in my head and I broke out laughing during sex.
– captain-slammi
7. …What?
A horse put it’s head in through the car window and licked my b*tt as I was in the throes of passion with a lady
– XavierBreff
8. It’s Catchy
Me and my friend occasionally have had s^x on three occasions and the last time I was eating her out, she had music playing.
Some advertisement that we would ALWAYS sing along to came on and without having to say anything to each other we both popped our heads up, sang along with the ad, then got right back down to business.
We didn’t realize how funny it was until WEL after we had finished.
– giguiou
9. Doing My Best
One of my exes loved dirty talk but I was still relatively inexperienced in that field and one time while she was riding me she starts doing the dirty talk and goes “are you gonna cum for me baby?” and my response was “well I’m gonna try.”
She started laughing but we kept going anyway
– p_t_dactyl
10. Ssssssmokin’
Had a second date with a guy. He stayed the night.
We made out but didn’t have sex… then the next morning, I definitely blew him, and as he was coming, my roommate, who had been cooking bacon or something in the kitchen, set off the smoke detector.
Something about the timing of the alarm going off as he was getting off just really made me laugh.
– blizzaga1988
11. Too Hot to Handle
I accidentally wiped my d%ck off with a paper towel that was previously used to wipe hot sauce off my hands…
Imagine sticking a lit cigar on the tip of your p*nis…
– putnamto
12. Junk Beds
Hostel in Rome. One of those cheap rooms with about eight bunk beds per room. Right on the other side of the wall was the communal area/bar.
I had been flirting with this kiwi girl for most of the night. At one point, we discover the bedroom is empty, so we close the door and go at it.
About ten minutes in, the bunkbed collapses on us. About twenty people rush in at the sound of the crash and screams.
We got teased pretty unmercifully for the rest of the night.
– Roland_T_Flakfeizer
13. Nature is Beautiful
Animal s^x came on the TV when we were getting started and then my girlfriend couldn’t stop laughing
– ThatGuyIsGeneric
14. Toying with Me
My GF was finishing me off in her mouth after we had been going at it for a while, and the exact moment as she grabbed my ball$… my dog chewed, with perfect timing, on a squeaky toy.
It was like getting a BJ in a cartoon.
– Zeryot
15. Sweet Nothings
I don’t know why but we were laughing at something before we had s^x and it just kept on popping inside our minds while we were having s^x so we ended up laughing while we were doing it until we finally stopped having s^x just so we could have a good laugh.
In the end, we were too exhausted from laughing that we just fell asleep naked.
– Mist3rTryHard
One time while alone in my room, my bed started to move on its own.
I got so fre*ked out that I went to the kitchen to try to settle myself, where I heard an eerie moaning. At this point I was convinced my apartment was haunted. That is, until I realized I was actually hearing s^x moans coming from upstairs, and the reason my bed was moving was that me and my roommates’ beds were up against the same wall on different floors. The apartment was being haunted by hanky panky.
What’s your funny s^x story?
Tell us in the comments.