Mika McKinnon is a scientist. Specifically, a geologist. She’s also a science communicator through her writings and speeches. She’s also a science consultant for the entertainment industry; having advised for such sci-fi franchises as Stargate and Star Trek.
Basically, she’s used to thinking about real science, movies, and how to bridge the gap between the two. And her latest effort at doing so was pretty unexpected, but I’ll admit it did teach me more about geology than I thought I’d learn today.
The question she set out to answer (and apparently frequently gets asked?) was “Is [Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson] igneous, metamorphic, or sedentary?”
In other words, “What kind of rock is The Rock?”
FAQ: Is @TheRock igneous, metamorphic, or sedimentary?
A: It’d be rude to examine his texture, so consider his origin & path.
He’s evolved under immense pressure, dramatically changed yet never shattered, and doesn’t explode even when provoked.
Metamorphic. pic.twitter.com/sW4RKZ3JyV
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
I never thought I’d be so moved and inspired by the story of minerals.
Igneous rocks crystallize from magma as they cool. Their composition & texture is determined from the start; from their first moments you can predict the path they’ll take.
You can’t do that with the Rock.
Even before you debate if he’s getting more or less hot with age. pic.twitter.com/CT56LVZQQJ— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
This lady has a gift for metaphor and I’m here for it.
Sedimentary rocks are made from the remains of other broken rocks cemented or compressed for form new rocks.
The Rock has a juvie record, got cut from his Big Break as a football star, repeatedly got boo’d (& injured) under multiple WWF names, and did not shatter. Somehow. pic.twitter.com/kgQ5VdnjPD
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
I can watch her talk about pressure all day….
Metamorphic rocks are altered by immense temperature, pressure, or both. Their fabric and texture changes and can keep changing. Even their composition can alter, creating a radically new rock that’s somehow true to its origin.
They just get shinier & more distinctive. pic.twitter.com/OpgbMYFEcN
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
He might have earned his stripes, but he still doesn’t have them.
Metamorphic rocks can be sub-classified by their texture: foliated or non-foliated?
The Rock does not appear to have stripes or banding, so I’m going with non-foliated. That means he’s likely gotten harder with progressive metamorphism.
Do not poke (or lick) without consent. pic.twitter.com/wLBgCwFZ1x
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
She follows up her thesis with some footnotes, as all good science should:
Note:
I’ve yet to observe The Rock under natural lighting, so it’s hard to distinguish if he’s just lightly foliated. He may possess slaty or phyllitic cleavage, aligned platey minerals too small to see yet enough to produce a distinctive shine.But that’d imply less pressure. pic.twitter.com/t7wQMOCTZg
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
Absolutely fascinating!
Non-foliated metamorphic rocks are classified by their composition.
Again, it’d be rude to subject the rock to a geochemical analysis, but again, we can look to origin.
US & Canadian dual citizenship = could be anything.
Somoan heritage = volcanic islands with reefs. pic.twitter.com/WCxYvdgDZk— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
Oh boy! Equations!
Reefs + pressure = marble
But The Rock consumes lemons without dissolving, so nah.Sand + pressure = quartzite
He’s Hard AF, but not nearly that commonSubducted talc = soapstone
But that’s extremely soft.And all are low pressure. Which doesn’t fit at all. pic.twitter.com/h9rJkiwEZe
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
Of course, science is a self-correcting system.
The most important part of science is revising theory to match observations.
I said The Rock did not appear to have banding.
It’s more accurate to say The Rock didn’t USED TO have banding.He’s been getting more striped over time.
He’s acquired banding with pressure. pic.twitter.com/w0Gi61VhGL— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
This gal knows her shist!
The Rock is a foliated rock with increasing metamorphic grade as he’s been under pressure for longer time.
He was low-grade slate as a footballer, a shiny phillite as a WWF star, transitioned to shist during his 2003 heritage tattooing, & is now gneiss.
How nice! pic.twitter.com/ve6b9u0S2I
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
Then she hits us with a tl;dr
So what type of rock is The Rock?
He’s a foliated metamorphic, transitioned to gneiss in 2017. He’ll likely continue to stay gneiss for the remainder of his career, potentially acquiring more banding.
Should he start getting hot-yet-squishy, he may transition to migmatite. pic.twitter.com/ov9IC1MLGZ
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
And now… the epilogue…
Epilogue:
1. Metamorphic rocks are not identified by taste, so licking The Rock will not confirm this classification. Licking is primarily diagnostic on water soluable rocks so your tongue can taste them. He doesn’t dissolve when submerged.And he’s on the Do Not Lick list: https://t.co/okPVFfIyzi pic.twitter.com/JGVKfUTfIy
— Mika McKinnon (@mikamckinnon) February 24, 2020
I leave all of this feeling oddly encouraged, and far more knowledgeable about rock formations, be they cliffs or jungle movies.
I’m also very disappointed to have to give up my dream of one day licking Dwayne Johnson.
If you were a rock, what kind of rock would you be?
Let us know in the comments.